Are hard.
Hard.
Hard has been the right word to describe a lot of my experiences lately.
Lately I’m so tired.
Tired of being in pain.
Pain is so pathetic.
Pathetic is how I feel.
Feel, feelings what are those? Who has those anymore? I know I don’t. Not lately at least. I’m numb.
Numb in the literal aspect from all of my medication, and numb mentally just because it’s so hard to be numb physically and to be completely there in your head, it really is. I feel like I’m losing it. But at the the same time, I know that at my lowest points is when I’m the most me. So I’ll take the pain as long as I’m not a shallow loser. Deuces bitches. I’m going to go wrestle a dinosaur in my dreams, or maybe pet some puppies. Those seem to be reoccurring.